It's not what you say, It's how you say it.

In the past 2 months I have been thrown into a whole new world. On the one hand it is great because I have met so many people with DS who are doing well and actively participating in society. (Unlike the picture that was painted for us in the hospital). They have jobs and homes, they participate in all kinds of activities, and just enjoy the simple things in life. (I wish that I were more like these amazing individuals). But on the other hand I feel like I have to constantly worry about offending someone with what I say. Now please do not be offended with what I am going to say next. I have neglected to write this for some time now for fear that I would hurt someone in some way, this is not my intention. But I want this blog to be a place where I can express what I am feeling without repercussions. I have found that the "R" word is a hot topic amongst these parents, and caregivers. (For those of you who don't know the "R" word is retard, or retarded. "T" and I have had many discussions sbout this since having our sweet little boy. We are unsure of what to think. I am guilty of using this word frequently. I remember as a child my mother telling me that it was not nice to say it, but I could never understand why. To me the "R" word has no relation to a person that has disabilities. How many times have you joked "You're so retarded", or that was retarded"? In either of those instances were you telling the person that they had disbilities, or has it just become a social norm to say? I can not wrap my mind around this. I know that this was a medical term back in the day, but now a days I think that it is an expression that has nothing to do with disabilities. Maybe I am nieve and one day I will have to face someone referring to my child as a "retard". But if DS is considered being "retarded" count me in. I want to be compared to someone who has so much love in them that it radiates to everyone around them, I want to be known for a smile that can make someone's day, I want to be known for being completely Christlike in all that I do. I want to be known for all of the lives that I touch, and for all of the inspiration that I would give to those around me. Have you ever been around a person with DS and not felt the simple joy that they have for life? (Don't get me wrong, we all have our moments of moodiness). My point is that I do not believe that the word "retard" is used in the same way that it was a few years ago. I just want everyone to know in advanced that I am sorry if I ever offend you by using this word, it is not intended to hurt, I just don't feel like it means the what it used to. Does anyone else feel this way or am I completely out of line? Well now that I have vented my feelings and will be shunned I am sure, here are some new pictures.

Brunton 1 month old.

I just love this little boy so much!

Oh ya, remember this cutie. I can not believe how grown up Coleman is these days. He is such a clown. We are pretty sure that the school is going to have our number on speed dial for him disrupting the class. But right now we just enjoy all of his antic's. Here are a few of my favorite things about Coleman from the past few days.

Coleman is obsessed with feeding the ducks. He talks about it nonstop. It is so fun to watch him yell at the ducks to come here and get the bread. He also yells at the "eagles" (seagulls) when they steal the bread from the ducks. Another of his obsessions is tractors. He can tell you what each tractor is, its job, and what color it is. A game that he loves to play in the car is name that tractor. He will yell out from the backseat when he spots when, and then he will decide who gets it. It is almost always the same. Coleman gets any blue or green ones (sometimes orange ones), Brunton gets the yellow ones, and Mommy gets the green ones. I love seeing him learn and grow, but at the same time I am sad that soon these days will end. He is so fun to be around (don't get me wrong he has his fair share plus of melt downs), I love just having conversations with him. My favorite moment this week was when just out of the blue Cole looked at me and told me that I was his best friend! He walks around the house singing all kinds of songs and if he senses that we are having a bad day he will ask us in his tiny(sometimes high pitched voice), "Whats matter", and then say "It's ok". He is such a good boy and the best big brother. I catch him talking to Brunton all the time. He tells him all about the world and what he is doing. When Brunton cries Cole will tell him "Don't worry mommy is getting the bottle, or mommy is coming its ok." He wants to hold Brunton every second of the day, and is constantly kissing him. I think that Brunton is lucky to have him. I know that as they grow Coleman will teach him many things, of course mostly about tractors, but thats okay by me!!!